After Devolson
I can hardly believe it, but it's been months since I've blogged, and we've only got four, scratch that! three months left of school.
Things were bad before devolson. And that normally happens. But then after devolson, things did not get better.
I'm more than half way through the year, and I am still working from 7 am to 10 pm every night (hence the lack of blogging). I have coworkers that are trying to back stab me at every turn. We did a push in model, which I was very excited about, but we were hardly prepared to do it at all. And then, there's the missing walls! And there's the little fact that I didn't know about until I was already hired- I have a caseload of 17 but I am also a half-time interventionist.
I'm being honest about my experience. I love the kids. But I feel that this job is so far beyond my ability I struggle on a daily basis, and I hate that.
I'm sad, because I was so excited to teach here.
But I faced up to the reality that I hate it and I'm not right for it. Getting two "basic" marks on my evaluation confirmed my fears. So, I had a frank conversation with my husband, and then my principal. She agreed that I was struggling and that it seemed like there's a gap between my capabilities and the work I produce, and that it's a very hard job.
I'm not sure where I'm going from here. I have contemplated working in another school, tutoring, or going back to school while starting a family.
I'm not sure what it's going to be, but I am not done with the world of education yet!
-J2
Things were bad before devolson. And that normally happens. But then after devolson, things did not get better.
I'm more than half way through the year, and I am still working from 7 am to 10 pm every night (hence the lack of blogging). I have coworkers that are trying to back stab me at every turn. We did a push in model, which I was very excited about, but we were hardly prepared to do it at all. And then, there's the missing walls! And there's the little fact that I didn't know about until I was already hired- I have a caseload of 17 but I am also a half-time interventionist.
I'm being honest about my experience. I love the kids. But I feel that this job is so far beyond my ability I struggle on a daily basis, and I hate that.
I'm sad, because I was so excited to teach here.
But I faced up to the reality that I hate it and I'm not right for it. Getting two "basic" marks on my evaluation confirmed my fears. So, I had a frank conversation with my husband, and then my principal. She agreed that I was struggling and that it seemed like there's a gap between my capabilities and the work I produce, and that it's a very hard job.
I'm not sure where I'm going from here. I have contemplated working in another school, tutoring, or going back to school while starting a family.
I'm not sure what it's going to be, but I am not done with the world of education yet!
-J2
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